You can find plenty of these on Starmen.net, but not mine!

CHAPTER 1:
It has been one year since Giygas was defeated for the second time. Onett had been peaceful since then, and Mayor GH Pirkle was taken out of office being thehorrible mayor he was. Paula had come all the way from Twoson just to see Ness again. This is where the story begins.

DING-DONG!

Ness's Mom: Would you get that Ness?

Ness: Okay mom!

(Ness opens the door)

Paula: Hello Ness.

Ness: Hi Paula, long time no see!

Paula: I know. How have you been?

Ness: Great. This new console came out. It's called the Nintendo 64, and I've really been enjoying it.

EDITOR'S NOTE: EarthBound came out in the late SNES days, so the N64 is new to them.

Paula: Wow, after we saved the world maybe you'll appear in a Nintendo cross over game!

*INSERT FORESHADOWING JINGLE HERE*

(Annoying Knock is heard)

Ness: Oh no! I'm not answering that!

(The door crashes open and Porky in his Spider-Mech appears)

Ness: What do you want Porky?

EDITOR'S NOTE: His real name is Porky. Pokey was a failed translation on behalf of Nintendo Of America

(Porky flashes a ray of light on Ness and Paula)

Porky: I've come to take care of what defeated Giygas!

Paula: Ness! Do something!

Ness: Not so fast Porky!

BATTLE BEGINS

Ness Tried PK Rockin

But it failed

EDITOR'S NOTE: While in EarthBound it says PSI Rockin, the original Japanese on says PK

Ness: What the hell? Why can't I use PK Rockin?

Porky: You know that ray of light I shined on you? It keeps makes you forget all your PSI moves! Now you have to learn them upon leveling up again!

Ness: DAMN!

Porky: Now I'm taking Paula with me! And there's nothing you can do about it.

(Porky Snatches Paula and flies away)

Paula: Ness, help!

Ness: NOOOO!

BATTLE ENDS

Ness's Mom: Ness, tell your friends to stop making so much noise while I masturbate!

END OF CHAPTER 1

If anyone wonders why Ness is talking, it's because he can talk, it's just that Nintendo likes silent protagonists.

CHAPTER 2:

Ness was thinking of how to get Paula back from Porky when the phone rang.

???: Hey Ness, it's your dad. You've been out there for quite a while now...

Ness: EARTHBOUND'S OVER DAD!

Dad: Jk. I just forwarded $5,000 into your bank account. See ya.

(Phone Rings again)

???: Ness, it's Dr. Andonuts! I heard everything that happened. News travels fast here.

Ness: You know how we can get Paula back?

Dr. Andonuts: I'd suggest heading over back to the 8 places that are only yours.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Mother 2 name of Your Sanctuary Locations

Ness: Okay, I got it.

Dr. Andonuts: Meet me here at my lab in Winters. Bring Poo as well.

Ness: I'll be there.

(Hangs Up)

Ness: I wonder who Porky's working for now. Well, on to Dalaam.

END OF CHAPTER 2

Admins if this is not an exception for double posting. I will accept a warning.

CHAPTER 3:

Ness arrives in Dalaam, the place is destroyed. He sees an unconscious Poo.

Ness: POO!

Poo: *Waking up* huh? Ness! What are you doing here.

Ness: Porky kidnapped Paula! He erased our PSI powers so we have to learn them again. Dr. Andonuts told us to meet him at his lab.

Poo: I can still use Teleport so lets go.

Later, In Winters:

Ness and Poo enter Dr. Andonuts's lab and meet his son Jeff there.

Jeff: So that's what happened.

Ness: That's right. We need to head to the eight place that are only mine.

Dr. Andonuts: I'm afraid it's not going to be that easy.

Ness: Why?

Dr. Andonuts: Porky anticipated that this would be your plan, so he warped the eight places to one different time and space.

Poo: So how do we get there now?

Dr. Andonuts: Well, I have been able to figure out where they are.

Ness: That doesn't explain how we're going to get there.

Dr. Andonuts: Luckily I've completed the Phase Distorter Mk IV. In this model, you can travel through time without being transferred into a robot like last time.

Poo: Alright! Lets go!

Ness: Do we have everything we need?

Jeff: Well, we all have our weapons, but I'll bring some stuff to fix up with us.

Dr. Andonuts: WAIT!

Ness: What?

Dr. Andonuts: I can't send you three into that place alone, so I traveled to find some allys in Rural America.

Ness: That's very far away. who did you find?

Four adults walked in. Two of them looked kind of like Ness and Paula. One kinda looked like Jeff. The last one was much older, and had sunglasses and a pompadour.

Dr. Andonuts: Gentlemen, This is Ninten, Ana, Loid, and Teddy.

Ninten: It's nice to meet you.

END OF CHAPTER 3

That's right everyone. It's a crossover. Also, this took me three tries to post it.

Cool Story Bro.
Tell it again! :troll:

Wow. First reply post and it's a troll.

Smash wrote:Wow. First reply post and it's a troll.

But in all seriousness, it actually is pretty good.

CHAPTER 4:

Ness: Who are you guys?

Ninten: I'll start from the beginning. Listen carefully.

Poo: JUST TELL THE DAMN STORY!

SPOILER ALERT!!!

Ninten: In the early 1900s, a dark shadow covered a small country in Rural America. At that time, a young married couple vanished mysteriously from their home. The man's name was George. The woman's name was Maria. Two years later, as suddenly as he left, George returned. He never told anyone where he had been or what he had done. But, he began an odd study, all by himself. As for Maria, his wife...

Jeff: Go on.

Ninten: She never returned.

80 years later, I was a Twelve year old boy doing who knows what, while sitting on my couch. Then, I got bored. So I left, but to my surprise, I was attacked by a lamp. Then a doll. After I punched the doll to death, it played a song. A five note long melody. So I began my adventure with a bat for some reason. And found two more melodies. One near the cemetery, where I saved a little girl, and one at the zoo, where this robot called a Starman Jr. was causing the animals to go WILD!

Next, I was teleported to a land called Magicant. There, I met a young lady known as Queen Mary. I asked her to sing her song to me, but she said she cannot remember it. There were eight melodies to the song,and I had obtained three of them. Then she said she was going to drink until her heart stopped. Afterwards, her words flowed out, like a fountain of information that took three days to clean up.

After I left Magicant, I went to a small town called Merrysville. I walked to the school and found a boy hiding in a trash can. His name was Loid. He came with me to Duncan's Factory where we lit a missile. Then we took the train to a town called Reindeer where we found an old lady who gave us the hat that a girl lost. We then took the train to Snowman and found a young girl named Ana. We gave her the missing hat and she came with us. Later we got three more Melodies.

Eventually, we made it to Youngtown. Youngtown was a place where all the adults had vanished, just like Ana's mother. A baby had taught us the PSI move Teleport.

A few days later, we arrived at the town of Valentine. There, we preformed a little karaoke at The Live Show. Then, we got attacked by the leader of the Black Blood Gang. His name was Teddy. After he realized I was a formidable opponent, he decides to come with us to avenge his parents who were killed on Holy Loly Mountain when he was a kid. He left Loid behind and we stayed in a cottage so that Teddy could make a few phone calls at the base of Holy Loly Mountain. There, Ana and I confessed our love to each other (They really did in the game) and did some other stuff that you kids don't need to know about. (That didn't happen in the game. It was rated E) Then we were attacked by a giant robot, who wiped all of us out. Loid saved us just in time though with a tank. Ana and I came to, but Teddy was unconscious for the rest of the battle. Loid decided to finally grow up so that he wouldn't be a weakling anymore.

At Holy Loly Lake, we found a Robot named F.O.E. Just kidding. Her name was E.V.E. She was built to protect me. She did, until we ran into another giant robot. E.V.E. destroyed it, but was destroyed in the process, She then played the seventh melody, and broke apart.

With seven melodies, we found the eighth melody in a stone. Me, Ana, and Loid, returned to Magicant, and sang the song to Queen Mary. Magicant then disappeared and Queen Mary...no. Maria then went to the place that her husband George was. Before that, She told us about a baby alien that she was caring for named Giygas, that was always wagging his tail, except when she sang him lullabies. Then he'd fall asleep and Maria would get drunk and party with George and the rest of Giygas's people. Turns out, the reason for his invasion was because George betrayed them, and escaped the planet with information of their race's most vital secret. PSI. Until then, we had know idea what we were fighting for. We then confronted Giygas. he looked like the Pokemon Mewtwo, (Although Pokemon wasn't out yet) and his attacks were inexpicable. All we could do, was sing the song. Listening to that song caused Giygas to remember the happy times he had with George and Maria. This caused him to back down and surrender swearing that he'd be back. That's what caused him to attack you guys ten years later. Afterwards, every missing parent including Ana's mom were freed, Ana and I got married, Loid became a hero at his school, and Teddy fully recovered and sang at The Live Show daily.

Ness: Everything makes sense now.

Loid: Now, we are here to help you.

Teddy: It's all part of my Fighting Spirit to help you guys.

Ana: Dr. Andonuts, can you wire the Phase Distorter directly into the time that we're going to?

Dr. Andonuts: I can wire anything directly into anything. I'M THE PROFESSOR!!!!

Jeff: That's great dad. Let's go. Everyone step inside the Phase Distorter.

Dr. Andonuts: Hold on, I'm coming too!

Ness: huh?

Dr. Andonuts: I'll build a lab where we are going. Visit me there occasionally once you've been to a place that is only yours Ness.

Ness: Got it. Hop in!

The Phase distorter turns on and they head through time.

Loid: Where are we?

Dr. Andonuts: We have traveled 1,000 years into the future, the place we are located is an island in the middle of nowhere.

END OF CHAPTER 4

Please list all of the references you've found.

CHAPTER 5:

Ness: How long have we been walking?

Jeff: About 5 minutes.

Poo: Where are we going anyway?

Loid: Look over there! It's a town!

Ana: What is this place?

There was a sign labeled: Tazmily Village

Ness: This place is rather peaceful.

???: I've never seen you around here before. Are you Pigmasks?

Poo: The fuck is a Pigmask?

???: That comment sounds unconvincing enough to confirm that you are not Pigmasks. Nice to meet you. My name's Kumatora. That's Lucas, the guy who looks like a bum is Duster, and that's Lucas's dog Boney. And you are?

Ness: I'm Ness. That kid in the glasses and the ninja looking guy are my best friends, Jeff and Poo.

Boney: Bark! (and I thought immature people laughed at my name)

Ninten: I'm Ninten. This is my wife, Ana, and these are my friends, Loid, and Teddy.

Lucas: Um, hi. Uh, what brings you to Tazmily?

Ness: Some fat piece of lard named Porky kidnapped my friend Paula.

(Intermission so that the writer can rage at Yaoi fangirls)

Jeff: He then time traveled to this time and kept her prisoner.

Duster: Porky's back?

Ness: What?

Lucas: Just three years ago, Porky attacked this time, only about a month ago, did we beat him.

Ness: My god, he's persistent.

Ana: Our mission is to go find the eight sanctuaries.

Loid: Mind helping us?

Duster: Sure. We can't let Porky take over the Nowhere Islands again.

Ness: Then lets split up into three groups. I'll go with Jeff and Poo, and everyone else, go with whoever accompanied you in your game.

Lucas: Wait! Ness, take my dog with you, he should prove to be helpful.

Jeff: Alright! Lets go!

Teddy: HOLD EVERYTHING!

Ninten: What?

Teddy: I haven't even had a line in this chapter.

Ness: Take it up with Evan. i'm sure he had a reason.

END OF CHAPTER 5

Right. I totally had a reason. OMFG PLEASE DON'T HURT ME TEDDY!

LOL, first reply and Smash gets mad. Good job Linko.

I rarely get mad. I was just mildly irritated.

You were fucking outrageous!

I think the term you are looking for is Outeaged.

Continue this fucking story or I'll cut you.

I'll continue this when I feel like it.

Smash wrote:I'll continue this when I feel like it.

You'll fucking do it because I fucking demand you to.

Smash continue, it's been four years.