HELLO! Are you a loner who masturbates every single day of his life? Are you forever alone? Have you never even kissed a girl? (Besides your grandmother, and parents.) THEN THIS IS THE LIFE FOR YOU! Following these three simple steps can get you into any girls pants any time of the day!!!

1. STEP ONE: Hygiene. Make sure you wash yourself good as possible when you wake up in the morning, because you don't want a girl to think you smell like shit!

2. STEP TWO: Penis pills. Girls don't like it when a guy has a small penis! A guy with a penis that is eight inches or smaller is considered puny for this generation of girls! So, either look up a guide to some penis exercises or buy some RON JEREMY PENIS PILLS!

3. STEP THREE: Alcohol. Make sure you get her really drunk, and slip her the date rape drug! Then, take her to a secret shack, your bedroom, camper, or even under a tree, and give it right to her!

IF THESE STEPS FAIL FOR YOU, SIMPLY TURN UP YOUR BASE AS LOUD AS POSSIBLE, TURN ON SOME SKRILLEX, PUT YOUR PENIS IN THE SUBWOOFER, AND ENJOY!

I don't know whether to laugh or cry at this.

Smash wrote:I don't know whether to laugh or cry at this.

Both.

So, did the three steps help you with your journey to find your sexual destiny?

You made me regret not having a social life.

With you having a social life, you could've been banging chicks everywhere! So what're you waitin' for?!

I'm small, skinny, and unattractive CL.

smash, best way to improve your social life is to stop talking to us here and spend more time talking with the people you know in real life, and even if your unattractive, find ways to at least look your best, have good posture, dress smart, all that crap. soon enough you'll be wheeling it like nobody's business

Easier said than done. Oh well, I've never really cared about my popularity because I care so much about my life as a geek.

Roshi, you shouldn't judge him, really. It's his choice. Good clothes are not going to help him much. But Smash, it's not as tough as you think :\

I HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE

:troll:

Well, you know what they say. Good grades, social life, enough sleep. You can only choose two. I chose one though.

Linkodude43 wrote:I HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE

:troll:

LOL sure. And I'm the king of Mushroom Kingdom.

Exactly, you're the Mama of the Mushroom Kingdom. That makes Linko non-social.

I have a VERY Social life, I meet up with friends every other decade! Beat that!

Okay, even I'M more social than that.

Linkodude43 wrote:I have a VERY Social life, I meet up with friends every other decade! Beat that!

Friends are too mainstream.

:forever alone:

Smash wrote:Okay, even I'M more social than that.

He was kidding, but technically he is still ahead of you, since you have no friends. Mama'd.

Step 4. Masturbation: Ask a girl to choke your chicken, and sign a contract of it. If she signs it and says yes, she has to jerk you off! Enjoy.

Skochko wrote:

Smash wrote:Okay, even I'M more social than that.

He was kidding, but technically he is still ahead of you, since you have no friends. Mama'd.

I will take the insult with pride

LOL Smash has no friends, but he has the tightest vagina!

Hey CL, remember back in 2008 when you were all quiet?

When was I quiet? And remember when you were GROUDON7777777?

Yes I do, quite a bit. I was an eleven year old idiot. Now I'm a fourteen year old geek. I prefer the latter.